A revelation

Would you believe it only just occurred to me a few days ago that parenting doesn’t get any easier as your children grow older?

The thought came to me after I had just finished chasing down my 2-year-old to put his coat on for the car. As I manhandled him into the garage, I wondered what I would do when I was no longer able to overpower him—or, even, to pick him up so easily. I would actually have to convince him to walk out of the house of his own volition. Gulp.

I think I had always pictured motherhood becoming much easier once Tyler is able to take care of himself, more or less. In my imagination, that “magic age” was about 5 or 6. Suddenly, our caregiver/caregivee relationship would morph into one similar to that of roommates—cohabitants of the same house. He would play quietly in his corner of the house and I would do my own thing in my corner.

Except, I forgot that the older Tyler becomes, the more he cares about what he does, who he sees, what he wears and where he goes. And, the older he becomes, the more power he has to make my life miserable—particularly in public.

Then again, I have the power to make his life miserable, too. The older he is, the better able he is to understand consequences of not listening. That, I think, is where the Love & Logic concept—offering kids a choice between doing something they should be doing or doing something decidedly more unpleasant—has a lot of merit. Of course, if he chooses the unpleasant thing—having toys taken away, going to school in his pajamas, etc.—I have to actually follow through with it.

It all sounds like so much work! I guess this is what everyone meant when they said that parenting is one of the hardest jobs you will ever do.

Then again, in what other job do you get to hear a little guy tell you, after a day away from you, “Mommy, I missed you!”

--Beth